Friday, December 12, 2008
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Ski Season Coming Soon
Ski season training exercises to get you prepared:
1. Visit your local butcher and pay $30 to sit in the walk-in freezer for a half an hour. Afterwards, burn two $50 dollar bills to warm up.
2. Soak your gloves and store them in the freezer after every use.
3. Fasten a small, wide rubber band around the top half of your head before you go to bed each night.
4. If you wear glasses, begin wearing them with glue smeared on the lenses.
5. Throw away a hundred dollar bill-now.
6. Find the nearest ice rink and walk across the ice 20 times in your ski boots carrying two pairs of skis, accessory bag and poles. Pretend you are looking for your car. Sporadically drop things.
Place a small but angular pebble in your shoes, line them with crushed ice, and then tighten a C-clamp around your toes.
7. Buy a new pair of gloves and immediately throw one away.
8. Secure one of your ankles to a bed post and ask a friend to run into you at high speed.
9. Go to McDonald's and insist on paying $8.50 for a hamburger. Be sure you are in the longest line.
10. Clip a lift ticket to the zipper of your jacket and ride a motorcycle fast enough to make the ticket lacerate your face.
11. Drive slowly for five hours - anywhere - as long as it's in a snowstorm and you're following an 18 wheeler.
12. Fill a blender with ice, hit the pulse button and let the spray blast your face. Leave the ice on your face until it melts. Let it drip into your clothes.
13. Dress up in as many clothes as you can and then proceed to take them off because you have to go to the bathroom.
14. Slam your thumb in a car door. Don't go see a doctor.
15. Repeat all of the above every Saturday and Sunday until it's time for the real thing!
Monday, November 24, 2008
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Those Poor Detroit Lions
Q. What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?
A. The Detroit Lions
Q. What do the Detroit Lions and Billy Graham have in common?
A. They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ."
Q. How do you keep a Detroit Lion out of your yard?
A. Put up goal posts.
Q. Where do you go in Detroit in case of a tornado?
A. To Ford Field - they never get a touchdown there!
Q. What do you call a Detroit Lion with a Super Bowl ring?
A. A thief
Q. Why doesn't Grand Rapids have a professional football team?
A. Because then Detroit would want one.
Q. What's the difference between the Detroit Lions and a dollar bill?
A. You can still get four quarters ou t of a dollar bill.
Q. How many Detroit Lions does it take to win a Super Bowl?
A. Nobody knows, and we may never find out.
Q. What do the Detroit Lions and possums have in common?
A. Both play dead at home and get killed on the road.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Monday, September 15, 2008
How the Colts Will Win the Super Bowl
In my opinion Tom Brady getting injured is the best thing that could have happened to the Colts. With out Tom Brady the Patriots will never win the AFC so with the Patriots out of the picture the Colts should be able to step forward and win the Super Bowl.
Friday, September 12, 2008
Thursday, June 5, 2008
The Detroit Red Wings and the Stanley Cup
Here is a link to an article my mom wrote about the Red Wings and the Stanley Cup:
http://walkinthewords.blogspot.com/2008/06/stanley-pup-helps-red-wings-bring-home.html
http://walkinthewords.blogspot.com/2008/06/stanley-pup-helps-red-wings-bring-home.html
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Why The Wings Lost Game 5
Many People ask why the Wings lost to the Pens in game 5 but it is so simple. The Red Wings could not get ahead early although they came back they then were to worn out to get the last goal in the 3rd overtime and there for lost the game.
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Granderson Inside The Park Homerun
An amazing hit and some fast running takes Granderson all the way around the bases on this amazing play.
Why The Pistons Suck
The Pistons Suck because they wont get rid of Rasheed Wallace who is just dragging the team down. In game 6 of the confrence finals he had 4 points and 5 fouls and he is the biggest whinning baby in all of sports. He will not post up like he is supposed to instead he takes mindless 3's. If we had Maxiel in the starting 5 instead of Rasheed Wallace we would have not only a better more agressive offensive team but a better deffesive team also with someone who is actualy excited to be out there instead of someone who has been there done that.
Friday, May 30, 2008
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Why the Red Wings will win the Sanley Cup
Everyone that is not a Penguins fan can tell you that the Red Wings will win the Finals but i can give you the reasons why.
The first reason they will win is not only they have experience but they have a higher skill level higher than the Pens.
The second reason is that even if the Red Wings cant win on the road the Pens cant either and the Wings have home ice advantage with the best crowd in the NHL.
The third reason is that the Pens cant handle being under the pressure of being the under dog.
And the last reason is that Chris Osgood is the best goalie in the NHL and if anything happens to him the Wings still have the second best in the NHL in Dominic Hasek and Fleury of the Pens cant stop the Wings offense.
Those are the four reasons the Wings will win the Stanley Cup.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Contest for T-Shirts
I wanted to tell you that my mom will be announcing an exciting contest on her site tomorrow. Check it out and enter for a chance to win some goodies. http://www.walkinthewords.blogspot.com
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Monday, May 19, 2008
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Tigers vs Angels
Finally I am going to my first baseball game of the 2008 season and it is when they finally started getting good. I am excited to go not just because of the game but because we get to be around all of the other fans and at The Comerica Park.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
The best home run hitter ever.
People say that because Barry Bonds has the most home runs ever that makes him the greatest at hitting homers ever. Well i have three things against that
#1. Barry Bonds does steroids and everybody knows it I mean thats why they put an astrix on the home run ball.
#2. Alex Rodriguez is the greatest home run hitter so far in the history of baseball. He has 522 home runs and he is only 32 and only 240 home runs short of Barry Bonds who has taken part in 22 seasons to Alex Rodriguez's 15 seasons.
#3. Even if Alex Rodriguez doesnt crush Bonds home run record Josh Gibson was believed to of had over 900 home runs in the Negro Leagues before he was able to play in the MLB.
Thats why Barry Bonds is not the greatest home run hitter ever.
How did the Pistons Lose?
Lots of sports fans sit and wounder, " How did the pistons lose to the Sixers?" Well the reason the Pistons lost to the sixers is because they under estimated the talent of the Sixers players and gave their starters a bit to much rest when they took a lead by fifteen and so the Sixers took advantage of the Pistons bench to pull a late upset. But trust me the Pistons will go on to win the series 4-1.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Who is the Best NBA Player Ever?
Who is the best NBA player ever? Some say Michael Jordan others say LeBron James, but one player I will always look up to is Magic Johnson. Magic Johnson played for MSU in college and later went on to play for the Las Angelas Lakers. So no matter what somebody else thinks i think Magic Johnson is the best ever.
The 22 Inning Game
Earlier this week The San Diego Padres and the Colorado Rockies took part in the longest game this season constisting of 22 innings and a Padres 2-1 win.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
The NBA Playoffs
I am from Michigan born and raised so of course I want the Pistons to win the title but they have some tough opstacles to get passed including the projected Eastern Confrence Championship against the up rising Boston Celtics. The question is will the Pistons prevail?
My Trip To East Lansing Michigan
Today I made a trip to East Lansing in Michigan to watch a bit of the Green V.S. White game with Tom Izzo as the honorary head coach of the Green team. You can check out his interview on the Big Ten Network.
I also went to the second game of the MSU V.S. U OF M baseball double header hoping to see a good game played by the Spartans but I saw the exact opposite of that when U OF M wholloped MSU getting 5 homeruns in the game to douse the Spartans 7-1.
I also went to the second game of the MSU V.S. U OF M baseball double header hoping to see a good game played by the Spartans but I saw the exact opposite of that when U OF M wholloped MSU getting 5 homeruns in the game to douse the Spartans 7-1.
A Day at Michigan State University
Jack is currently in East Lansing at Michigan State University attending the Green and White game and a baseball double-header. His dutiful slave, servant and moderator is here creating his new blog page so he can report on the days events when he returns. Stay tuned for more...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
